Networking – an investment in yourself and your career
By Lalana Zaveri
October 14, 2025
When you hear the word networking, what thoughts come to you?
- “It’s not for me. I’ve never really benefited from it.”
- “I never know what to say or how to start a conversation.”
- “I would rather spend my time on something more constructive. I’m pressed for time anyway.”
- “Ugh… I don’t want to be one of those people.”
- “I have enough of a network, thank you very much.”
Sounds familiar? You’re not alone. For many women leaders, networking comes with a swirl of hesitation, scepticism, and mild existential dread.
And yet… think about these questions for a moment:
Have you ever been helped by an ex-colleague who remembered you fondly?
Have you enjoyed helping someone you don’t directly work with, just because you could?
Have you felt good about reconnecting with someone from your past?
If your answer to any of these was “yes,” then you’ve already experienced the benefits of networking — possibly without even calling it that. Networking, at its best, is simply an investment in yourself and your career. And like most activities that create future wealth, opportunity, or happiness, we tend to put it off until it becomes absolutely necessary… or until someone else forces us to do it (thanks, Dad).
Before we look at the what and the how, I think it’s important to answer a “why”……Why do women find networking particularly abhorrent?
Sally Helgesen and Marshall Goldsmith offer an answer in their seminal book How Women Rise.
Women, they argue, are often exceptional at building strong, authentic, trust-based relationships — thanks to social conditioning and communal instincts. But when it comes to leveraging those relationships for support, advocacy, or opportunity — even when the other person has clearly said they’re happy to help — many women hesitate.
Why? Because it can feel “icky.” It can feel like asking for favours. It can feel as if we’re contaminating a pure relationship with self-interest.
Here’s the truth: networking is not manipulation. Leveraging relationships is not using people. It’s participating in the natural give-and-take of professional life. Most people actually want to help — and feel good when they do.
When we don’t allow others to support us, we’re not being noble; we’re often reinforcing self-limiting narratives about worthiness and reciprocity. Recognizing this is the first step toward more empowered networking.
Ok, I get it but what do I actually do at a networking event?
There are two broad types of networking that are worth mastering. The first is the one-on-one coffee catch-up variety. The second is the event networking kind, where you navigate rooms full of people balancing teacups, name tags, and hopes of not feeling awkward.
Let’s take them one at a time.
In one-on-one networking, the biggest hurdle is often getting started. Someone reaches out to meet you, and you say yes — or perhaps, you’re the one who wants to reconnect with someone from the past. The key here is simple: say yes more often. If someone invites you for a chat, accept. If you want to reach out but can’t think of a grand reason, just say, “I’d love your advice on something.” People rarely refuse a chance to feel wise.
Once you’re in conversation, focus on building reciprocity. Offer help where you can. Make it clear that the relationship is two-way — not a transaction, but a mutual investment. And yes, prepare a short, compelling way to talk about what you’re up to these days. Think of it as a mini elevator speech — a blend of personal and professional that gives people a memorable hook.
For example, at a networking event with the Mayor of New Jersey as the chief guest, one invitee began his introduction by saying, “Whenever I visit New Jersey, I feel like I’m visiting my in-laws — because of the amazing Gujarati food I get here.” It was witty, warm, and personal. The Mayor referenced it in her speech later. That’s the power of a short, well-crafted self-introduction: it sticks.
Event networking requires a slightly different muscle. First, just show up. Yes, even on a bad hair day. The simple act of turning up at events you’ve been invited to is half the work.
Second, remember that the hardest part of starting a conversation is usually the first line. Luckily, it doesn’t have to be profound. If you’re stuck, here are some easy openers:
- “Are you drinking their tea or coffee? I’m very particular about mine — I need your opinion first.”
- “I loved your keynote. I particularly connected with the part where you said ______.”
- “I’m curious — what did you think about that last speaker? I liked the question you asked.”
These aren’t networking pick-up lines; they’re simple invitations to connect as human beings. Most people are just as relieved as you are when someone makes the first move.
Before you go, take a couple of minutes to reflect on your current networking style
Imagine a simple two-by-two framework (or even better, find a piece of paper and draw one for yourself).
1. On one axis, picture your willingness to build relationships – everything from saying yes to invitations, reaching out to old contacts, and showing up at events.
2. On the other axis, picture your willingness to leverage those relationships – asking for introductions, advice, support, or opportunities when appropriate
Where do you fall?
If you’re low on both axes, networking probably feels like a chore you avoid until absolutely necessary. You may rely on serendipity and hope that your work speaks for itself. (It doesn’t always).
If you’re high on building but low on leveraging, you’re likely well-liked and respected, with a strong network – but you’re not fully using that network to advance your goals. This is where many women sit, often feeling awkward about “asking.”
If you’re low on building but high on leveraging, you might come across as opportunistic – the person who appears out of nowhere only when they need something. This quadrant isn’t sustainable.
The sweet spot is high on both building and leveraging. This is where networking becomes a natural, generous, mutually beneficial part of your professional life. You show up, you connect authentically, you offer value – and when needed, you ask without guilt. People respect that, and doors open.
Networking doesn’t require you to become someone you’re not. You don’t need to morph into the super-extrovert working a room like a politician at a fundraiser. What it does require is intention: saying yes, reaching out, showing up, offering help, and being willing to ask.
When you build and leverage well, you’re not gaming the system. You’re participating in a shared human web of support, opportunity, and generosity.
So the next time you get an invitation to a networking event, or the urge to reconnect with someone flickers in your mind — say yes. Reach out. Ask. Offer. Build. Leverage.
And when that small voice in your head mutters, “Ugh… networking,” you can smile knowingly and reply, “Actually, I’m investing.”
About the author:
Lalana is a senior facilitator at Navgati, bringing over 25 years of diverse experience across Operations, Entrepreneurship, and Leadership Development. Since joining Navgati in 2013, she has delivered more than 500 leadership development workshops for global and regional audiences across industries. A certified MBTI practitioner, ICF-accredited coach, and Hogan assessor, Lalana is known for her dynamic facilitation style that blends psychological insight with practical business acumen. Participants consistently commend her for her ability to bridge theory with real-world application, through compelling examples, case studies, and storytelling. Outside of her professional life, Lalana is a pianist, actor, and fiction writer. An enthusiastic driver, she also enjoys mentoring others, especially women, in confident, assertive driving.